Saturday, 24 October 2015

Lubricated Lips

Young Nikolaj Ehlers tasting the flavour of his hockey future, and it's very, very sweet.

Sunday, 27 September 2015

11 Days...

Watch for me on Dragons' Den this season. I'll be pitching 5% of the rights to this blog in exchange for $3.50 and a nice lunch somewhere of my choosing. 

I'll look something like this:

Order your Joki Dokey t-shirt today by calling 1-855-438-0681

Monday, 15 June 2015

Joki Gothic

Things to do while you wait for hockey season: Edit Joki's face into famous artwork and pictures of people you know.

Sunday, 14 June 2015

Looking Forward

Forget about this year Jokinen my man. Next year is going to be a good one. 

An especially good one for Jets fans. Not because of the great prospects coming to join the lineup, but  because we get to see Dustin Byfuglien play against Evander Kane...



Saturday, 21 February 2015

Toronto Mapledisappointments

As you may have heard, Olli was ripped from the comfortable womb of sure-as-shit playoff contention and thrust into the cold, heartless, self-loathing world of the Toronto Mapledisappointments. Fortunately long time Jokinen fans can still enjoy the memory of his singular NHL playoff appearance in 17 years when he played in Calgary.

When asked how he felt about the move Olli responded by kneeing the reporter in the testicles for 20 years and said "something like that." 

So to cheer everyone up here's a fart joke...

How does Joki save the team money on smelling salts? With his 100% cabbage and lutefisk diet.

Jokinen relishing a large flatulence while Peter Holland looks on in obvious distress. 

Thursday, 12 February 2015

The Benchwarmer's Chapped Buttocks

Jokinen performs a traditional interpretive dance titled Being Held Out of the Lineup Licks a Lot of Ass:

Despite Nashville's division leading performance I still find them more boring to watch than reruns of Friends. However, they'll be playing the Winnipeg Jets tonight, so perhaps we can watch Byfuglien turn someone into mush.